Family,Relationship and Society

Marital Rape--An Alarmingly common reality

Marriage is our society's most cherished and sacred relationship.Sex in marriage is not just a form of physical unioun,it is also held as spiritual union that has the potential to bring deep fulfillment and joys to the sexual partners.To talk of "marital rape" is therefore is shocking and contentious and create confusion--especially since rape is widely regarded as a sexual transgression and abuse by sheer force,while marriage is seen as involving socially sanctioned sex wherein both partners have agreed to cohabit.There are hundred of stories that expose women's real life experiences of sex in marriage.They show how sex can be nonconsensual,forced and painful for married women.What exactly is Marital Rape?Consent to sex is automatically assumed in marriage,yet we all know from personal experience how our sexuality is an aspect of our conciousness and is more than just an instinctive drive.Yet women are expected to be sexually available to their men irrespective of their personal desires,and people at large donot think of sex by coercion in marriage as rape.In reality,women's experiences in marriage of nonconsensual and coercive cover a spectrum of forms wherein the use of verbal threats,physical violence and injury and even the use of weapons is made by their own husbands in the privacy and legitimacy afforded by marriage,to thrust unwanted forms of sex .Much of sexual violence in marriage is rotine and made invisible through factors like the culture of silence,ideas of masculinity and feminity,and the sacred nature of the marital union.Loyalty to the family,fear,inability to leave the relationship due to dependencies,acceptance of sex even against one,s wish as a husband's right and a wife's duty,and other such restraints keep many women from talking of the violence in their bedrooms even to their close friends and relatives.There is an urget need to create institutional responses to this much hidden crime.Women need first of all,to break the silence surrounding this violence and see the possibility of defining a changed socio-cultural context.The criminal justice system,the healthcare system and especially the mental care system,shelters homes and counselling cells need to recognize ad respond to the sexual dimensions of violence against womens in homes.This endeveour can be positively impacted if we as women,refuses to be creatures of male lust and aggression.Admitting our own discomfort with being sexually abused and coerced by our own men is the first step to challenging social expectations that emphasise women,s sexual subordination as essential for social and familal stability.

Family,Relationship and Society

Women--Victims of blind beliefs

The Indian sub continent was partitioned on the basis of religion,but the division has not helped in reducing discrimination against women.The old orthodox community customs and beliefs remain both in india and pakistan.In pakistan,in a remote village in multan,an 18 year old girl was gang raped as a punishment decided by the village eldres for her brother courting a girl belonging to another tribe.In india too several cases of "community justice"inflicted on lovers of different castes are reported.The girl and boy are killed to save the "honour" of the families concerned.Such cases make a splash in newspapers,police register cases and the judicial process,in its long-winding way,dries up as no one cooperates with the prosecution because the whole community has colluded in commiting crime.The instance of an atrocity commited on a young woman in indore was of different nature.Sangeeta sode's crime was going on a pilgrimage to vaishnodevi with a friend without informing her family.How was one know she was not seduced during the pilgrimage?The community leaders organised an agnipariksha to prove her chastity.The ceremony required holding a heated iron rod in her hand.It is some consolation that after a furore was raised against the gang rape in multan,the pak authoroties prosecuted the criminals responsible for the crime, the village head man and the rapists.After a speedy trial,6 persons involved were given death punishment,a remarkable judgement in a case where community collusion was involved.In india,heinous crimes against women go practically unpunished because of the delay in courts.Women just go to courts for the justice and what they get are dates,another dates and some more dates.Situation differs only if you belong to some good and well-known family.If we take the case of sangeeta as an instance,would the same punishment be given ,if the same thing has been done by a boy.This is where question stops????

Family,Relationships and Society

Thank God For Little Girls

Women's who has ambtions for their daughters are simple homemakers,full time mothers.The kind whose universe revolves around their family and their children and who might have put their own ambitions on hold just to be there 24x7.They were selected by an MNC for writing award-winning essays on what they wished for the future of their daughters.They would have some very definite views on what they wanted their daughters to be ----everything that they themselves could not be.After all, psychologically ,most of us wish that for our kids.We want our children to be famous.We want our children to be the singers we never were.Or climb that mountain we only stared at from base camp.Or soar the heights of success that we felt too dizzy to fly.Ofcourse, they wanted their daughters to be achievers.But these women not once mentioned that they wanted their children to become doctors or engineers.What each mother wanted was to let her do what SHE,the child,wanted.Without coercion.Without restraint.Each mother seemed to have decided that no matter what her daughter's choice,the mother's role would be to be there at each step.Their wish list for their daughters was equally heart-warming.Some women would like their daughters to learn to be independent and confident.Some hoped that their daughters would learn from their faliurs.When asked one women put it very beautifully as she said--"I want her to know that success could also be tinged with failure,and that you may not learn much from success,but failure will teach you a lot.I am sure that there are thousands of mothers out there,who may not be as eloquent but nonetheless are spinning out equally pragmatic and sensible dreams for their daughters.Teaching them to sift truth from fiction.Showing them how to fly high with their feet firmly on the ground.What we know need is a similar exercise on what mothers are dreaming for their sons.To start with,we need women teaching their boys that their sisters have the right to the same ambitions they have.Then we will not need a woman's qouta in Parliament.And the glass ceiling will have been shattered once and for all.

Exercise to slim your Waist line

"Stand with your feet wide apart and the arms stretched out .Twist the body,first to the left,then to the right and repeat it several times"

How to make Cleansing cream at home

Cleansing creams are used not only to lift the dust ,but also to remove stale make up.Make up has waxy base which cannot be properly penetrated and cleansed simply by using soap and water.A cleansing cream or lotion is essential for this.Here are few cleansing creams which are very easy and quick to make in the comfort of your home:--

Rose Water Cleansing Cream
Galen,A greek physician of the 2nd century,made this cleansing cream with the following ingredients:--
1 1/2--Tablespoon beeswax or white paraffin wax
1 Tablespoon emulsifying wax
4 Tablespoon mineral oil
6 Tablespoon rose water
1/2 teaspoon borax and
a few drops of rose oil(perfume)

Melt the wax and oil together,and at the same time heat the water and borax and make sure that the borax is completely dissolved.Remove both bowls from the heat and pour water in to the oil.Continue stirring until a white cream starts to form.Add a few drops of rose oil when the mixture begins to cool.Carry on beating until the mixture thickens...


I hope you all will like the recipie.In my next post i will add another new recipie of cleansing cream..

Wanna Check Out Your Current Weight And Required Weight Without Spending A single Penny---Here Comes"www.MyFitnessPal.com"..

Hi everybody,
I know its really tough if somebody says"Hey what have you done to yourself? or Look at yourself in mirror.
Really all these comments are hard to bear.Its really seems absurd ,given that we know the health risk associated with being over-weight.But still we overlook it ,may be because of less guidance or we feel depressed and intentionally overlook it.Exceesive weight can result in various types of dreadful diseases.To avoid ,we need to have a regular check or track on our weight gain and have to keep in mind the healthy diet intake.
But this is only done if there is something which can help us to do all these trackings.
Yes...,you all are lucky enough that there is one website which helps in doing all these funtions for us and that too for free.Yes ,this site is truly 100% free - no credit card is ever required.

I want to spread the word about free diet and fitness website: http://www.myfitnesspal.com

Apart from normal features ,it has got three main essential features:--
1.Calorie counter
2.Diet journal
3.calorie chart

Calorie counter:--
Calorie counter is fast and easy to use and will teach you the nutritional contents of what you are eating, and consequently, how you can make better food choices.It will track a record of the food you have eaten in past.This is purely 100% free to join and they will not ever ask for a single cent from you.Isn't it great !!!!.Here is the link
http://www.myfitnesspal.com

Diet journal:-Diet journals are available free and will provide all the necessary information and tips and tools to lose weight.It is the effective way to keep an eye to your calories intake.Lose weight with our free diet journal .Track meals and exercise quickly and easily.To visit,please click on:--
http://www.myfitnesspal.com

Calorie chart:--Calorie chart will provide you all the necessary nutition facts for the food.It will tell you about the actual content of fats,calcium,iron,sodium,potassium etc in the food we intake.This will give us the correct idea of the actual content in per serving.

Here is the link :--http://www.myfitnesspal.com/food/calorie-chart-nutrition-facts

There fore ,with the help of all these features,you can easily know the actual figure or correct idea of your diet regime and also about the present weight and the required weight.Visit and join at http://www.myfitnesspal.com/.
It is flexible as it works with any diet - Atkins, South Beach, The Zone, and more!
It has got the message boards that provides motivation and help 24/7.

So What are you waiting for you can help others by first helping yourselves....

CAN STRESS TRIGGER ACNE PROBLEM? WHAT IS THE SOLUTION?

Everyone experiences stress. Without it would be so laid back we would hardly move, our lives would be at a standstill and we would be incapable of reacting to danger.Stress, in physiological terms, means the release of adrenaline into the bloodstream caused by panic or fear. When this happens, the sebaceous glands go into overdrive producing sebum. This increases the likelihood that pores will become clogged with the sticky substance, thereby resulting in the development of comedowns.
Elimination of stress from life completely is not possible. Nevertheless, you can manage your life by adopting some very useful stress management techniques. Establishment of certain habits to encourage relaxation is important to lessen stress from your life. Teens are more prone to this type of outbreak because of hormonal changes.
If you find yourself wanting to manage stress in your life, but you feel you just do not have time to learn a new technique or take on a time-consuming regular activity, you are in luck. These are stress relievers for busy people like you: they are easy, quick, or fit into your schedule with little fuss. If you do not have a lot of time to devote to change, these will give you a good return for little effort.
Taking vitamins can help you in relieving stress. You should take daily vitamins, which will boost your immune system. You should always consult your doctor before taking Vitamin B complex, Calcium and Magnesium, and Vitamin C .But they are best and quick method for stressful people to heal them. In addition, they can help in enhancing beauty.
Listening music is one of the best ways to relieve from stress. Music has proven to provide health and stress relief benefits, and can be easily used in daily life to relieve stress. Busy people can turn on music during their morning routine, commute to and from work, during dinner, or at other times to relieve stress as they go about their daily activities.
Meditation and yoga can also turn fruitful in this process. Yoga, breathing exercises can calm your body and soul too. It is creating wonders since ages. Yoga is also proved in beautifying the skin .One very effective exercise is to 'inhale peace' and 'exhale your stress'.
Aromatherapy is a very gentle form of massage and utilizes essential oils extracted from aromatic plants and herbs. It is based on the belief that smells are very important to your well-being, inducing moods of calm and helping us to re-orientate ourselves. Thus results in distress ourselves. These oils also help in curing acne problems.
Optimists and positive thinkers experience better health, less stress, and more 'luck' in life. While it takes a little practice to develop a more positive frame of mind, the practice takes little extra time and can really change your whole experience of life and how you live it. After some initial learning and a bit of practice, and the rewards are continual, which is a pretty bit payoff. Not sure if you are an optimist or pessimist?
It is said that "Man is a social animal" and socializing plays a pivotal role in curing stress. So go ahead and meet people you know or start making new friends. Chats with them on topics, which make you, laugh. Establish close ties with family and friends. A group support will tremendously boost your immune system.
Eventually, you can help yourself. Try to adopt these methods in your life for a stress free life and acne free face. Live it. After some initial learning and a bit of practice, and the rewards are continual, which is a pretty bit payoff. Not sure if you are an optimist or pessimist?

Healthy Heart Diet for Longevity

Forget about what you know about eggs,nuts and margarines.Forget about the US department of Agriculture's food pyramid.The low fat high carbohydrate diet that has been promoted for over a decade to prevent coronary heart diease may not be the best diet after all.Researchers from the famed Harvard University have now presented a healthy heart diet that question the original diet-heart hypothesis.The new healthy heart diet is based on large numbers of diet studies involving hundreds of thousands of people.In the proposed new healthy heart diet they have put rice,bread,sugar right on the top of pyramid-to be eaten moderately.And good oils have been put at the bottom of the pyramid.This radically changes the current thinking on diet.Here we give some foods that is considered to be a healthy heart diet and some to give a pass.We also address some controversial foods.
1. TEA- The recent study says that consumption of 1 to 2 cups of tea a day resulted in 46% decrease in the development of hardening of arteries and lowers the risk by 69% if taken 4 cups.Black tea is a healthy heart diet which contains fairly high levels of compound called flavanoids,a family of antioxidents known to protect against free radical damage in heart arteries.
2. NUTS-Nuts are also considered as a healthy heart diet although they have been much feared because of their fat content.The study involving some 90,000 women showed that women who ate an ounce of nuts atleast five times a week for 14 yrs lowered their risk of heart disease by 30%.Nuts are rich in fibre and monosaturated fats, knownto counteract heart disease.Nuts are also rich in various antioxidants.
3. Garlic/Onion-Heart healthy diet consist of eating garlic and onion daily.It helps in detrmining artery-clogging and even heal a damaged artery.Even quarcetin,an antioxidant found in onion has been found to be useful.Studies are showing that onions can increase good cholestrol.Eat them raw for best effect.
4.Red Wine-A recent study from the medical center in boston reported that people who drink alcohol thrice a week are less likely to develop heart disease than are nondrinkers.Red grapes may also do the trick for non-drinkers.
5.FISH-The study has proved that fish is also considered as a heart healthy diet and has been scientifically validated and accepted as part of mainstream medicine.However beware of contimination of fish-especially the predatory type.
6.Soy Protien-The Food and drug administration of US have concluded that 25gm of soy protien as a part of diet low in saturated fat and cholestrol can reduce the risk of coronary heart disease.However,this should not be the main stay of your diet.
7.Chocolate- Chocolate helps your heart as well-the darker the better.Its flavanoids,a family of antioxidants,help the body resist cell damage from free radicals.Hence making it a heart healthy diet.
8. Honey-Drinking honey with water increases the antioxidants level in the blood.But,make sure it is pure and unadultereted.One of the easiest ways to make sure that honey is stored in glass bottles and not plastic containers as plastics are known to get etched with pure honey.
These are some of the heart healthy diet ,free of cholestrol.But you could lack choline which can give rise to liver damage if you stop eating high cholestrol food completely.Choline is a b-complex vitamin.found in foods such as eggs and liver.

A Move for every Mood--Workout for those moody blues.

As urban life gets tougher,more competitive and increasingly stressful,finding a
few quick and easy exercises to elevate your mood is the call of the day.Here
are some fast mood-lifters;do them anytime,anywhere.They may look rather
cartoonlike,and so may you,but to your surprise you will find that they have an
instant reaction!And you need not haveto do any of them in public.You can do
the following once or more times,depending on how you are feeling.
VENT YOUR ANGER
The silent screamThis will help you releasing your anger via making the actions of a scream,a
silent one,and will give you a surprisingly instant fix.Open your mouth, take a
deep breath and let go with all you have,without making a sound.A Deep BreathWith your eyes open or shut.slowly take a deep breath and then release it just
as slowly,drawing your awareness towards the breath,imagining giving vent to
your anger when exhaling compard ti inhaling.
WORK YOUR DEPRESSION
CardioNeed a quick pick me up?Cardio exercise is a fabulous mood-lifter.Take a walk.You could team this with a strength exercises by carrying weights
while walking.After a few minutes of walking,break into a little jog.Go in for a session of aerobics.The music and the tempo helps a lot.Swim a few laps.The water will relax you and the exercise will help you get back
in good form.Take the stairs.Or skip rope.Go biking,but not on the streets.Cycle around in a par,beauty in nature is
always a mood booster.
Smile/LaughIf you are feeling a bit blue,force that smile or laugh and see how good you will
start to feel!
STRESS BUSTER MOVES
The Hair PullStress starts in the mind and accumulates all over.Run your hands to various
parts of your hair,clenching down and pulling upwards,slightly straining the
hair at the skull.Hold this position for a moment or two.Work through the entire
scalp in this way.
Forehead tappingUsing the pads of your fore and middle fingers((not the bony tips of the
nails),firmly tap away on your forehead,covering the entire surface area.Feel
the stress drain out of your face and skull like sand out of bag.
WAKE-UP CALL FOR BOREDOM
Upward StretchStretch upward and outward to shake yourself out of a spell of lethargy.If the
body feels awake and alive,so will the mind.
YawnIf you need a quick wake-up call,force a yawn and see how alert and alive you
immediately feel!Yawning is the body's natural way of bringing you back into focus.

WHAT VITAMINS HELP IN ACNE PROBLEMS AND TREATMENT

Intaking vitamin supplements for getting rid of acne can really be effective.As vitamins give a boost to your immune system,thus fight with bacteria causing acne.Oral skin supplements promises to beautify your skin from within.Overtime, your skin quality will improve making it more beautiful,younger and blemish free.Specifically,while oral supplemnts are effective for skin health,what are these supplements and how effective are they?
The fact is most people are deficient in vitamins, minerals and herbs that are important for your body to function properly. Only 9 to 32 percent of Americans eat the recommended three to five servings of vegetables every day. Remember, your skin is the largest organ of your body. It requires proper nutrition to function properly. Just like every other part of your body.
The facts is that our body needs proper nutrition which is unable to get from our daily diets .Here are some vitamins and minerals which act as an antioxidants to fight from free radicals and results in acne free skin.Excessive doses can be just as harmful as deficiencies,so it is best to abide by recommended daily allowance.
VITAMIN A-- Vitamin A is critical for the normal life cycle of skin cells.Vitamin A deficiency causes skin to become dry ,fragile and prone to acne and blemishes.Vitamin A is also a powerful antioxidant needed to rid your body of toxins.On the other hand, excessive vitamin A intake can cause serious toxicity and should be avoided.Vitamin A is found in carrots, green vegetables, oranges and bananas.
VITAMIN B-complex--Vitamin B complex is found in sweet potatoes, chickpeas, and green peppers. Vitamin B also acts as an antioxidant. If the acne is caused by stress, Vitamin B can replace nutritional deficiencies caused by the stress and which may be contributing to the acne. Vitamin B5 is particularly beneficial.
Zinc--Zinc, especially in the form of zinc gluconate or zinc sulfate, can help prevent acne. Zinc helps heal blemishes, reduces inflammation, and reduces androgenic hormonal effects on the skin.
Vitamin E is excellent for speeding up the healing process, due to its antioxidant capacity. It also helps with the absorption of vitamin A.
VITAMIN C also helps in healing acne problems especially with bioflavanoids.It has got anti-inflammatory substance.Vitamin C and E and beta-carotene has been touted as anti oxidants that reduce free radicals.
These all vitamins and minerals will give your immune system a great boost and also helps in healing acne and blemishes.But getting them all seperately will affect your pocket and will be expensive ,so the best method is to take multi-vitamins to cover them all.What,s more ,there is nothing to lose and everything to gain since multi-vitamins are simpler to take and cheaper than taking individually.